End of the Year Wrap-Up, Dealing with Breakups

The first thing to remember when reading this is, this is not the gospel.  There is no perfectly tested way to get over a bad breakup.  This is just my opinion on how to get through it.

Breakups are called ‘breakups’ for a reason.  It is the end.  If it wasn’t bad, they would call it something else.  Breakups suck, no doubt about it.  But the grieving time will pass.  I assure you of this.  For some it takes longer.  You have to keep living.  And sometimes that is hard, because so much of your daily life revolved around this ‘said’ person.  But in my experience I have found that continuing to do these certain things, that in time it becomes that much easier.  Just because said person is out of your life, does not mean your whole life has to change.  The things you two did were enjoyable, yes, but not only because said person was there but also because you liked them as well.  So go continue liking them now.

Breaking up is a big process.  Not a lot of people realize that.  Ultimately it affects you and the other person, but there are many other parties involved here.  If it was a long relationship, you have both probably met each other’s families.  And if it was really long, there is a possibility that your families had also met at one point or another.  So now you have to explain to your parents and friends what happened.  And you know they are going to ask about it.  They will notice that said person is not around anymore.  And these questions are actually very helpful.  It will allow you to talk about it and get it out there in the open, as painful as it may be to do so.  This way it is not building up inside you and ultimately causing you to explode emotionally somewhere.  In that case, let’s hope it is not at work because then that is another ‘breakup’ article about how to deal with unemployment.

After a breakup it is really important to use the resources you have around you.  This is your circle of friends, your mom, or that ex that turned out to be your best friend.  And we all have one.  They have stuck by you through every relationship and every crazy bf/gf that didn’t ‘appreciate’ you being friends with your ex.  Talk to these people.  And not so they can bash said person about what a fool they were for leaving you.  They need to reaffirm how strong a person you are and how much you have grown as a person through this relationship.

The hurt will pass.  For some it passes quickly.  For others, it takes a lot longer.  And that is ok.  Do not get discouraged.  And please, please do not go looking for the next Mr. Right.  He will end up being Mr. Right Now Who Didn’t Compare to Mr. Yesterday, in most cases.  Be single.  Enjoy your new life.  I am not saying to look at the breakup as a blessing but as an opportunity.

Now take it and run!


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